Proving that even the most august of chefs can falter, Jean-Georges Vongerichten's ground-floor establishment in ABC Carpet has a supposedly Mexican menu, some of which reads like the inventions on a Top Chef episode. Putting fresh peas, raw sunflower seeds, and extraneous green matter on the top of your guacamole is an affront to one of the world's most perfect dishes. Jean-Georges: For Escoffier's sake, and for the sake of all your food-obsessed countrymen, fix the damn thing!

Like guacamole, the masala dosa is one of the most perfect foods ever made, a crepe of adventitiously fermented raw-rice and raw-lentil batter stuffed with spicy spuds. But take that same wrapper, fill it with bottled spaghetti sauce and refrigerator-case, already-grated "mozzarella" cheese, and you have culinary disaster.

People often complain that the crappier, flashier, and sweeter mixed drinks taste like soda pop, but what if the mixed drink qualifies as actual soda pop? That's the case with the so-called Purple Drank at chicken-and-waffle specialist Sweet Chick. This fizzy cocktail is made with intensely purple Concord grape juice. The flavor (and color, too) is repulsive – and the juniper-tasting gin doesn't help either.

Ramen with Jewish deli leanings doesn't sound like a great idea: in this case utilizing Montreal-style smoked meat that might as well be pastrami and frustratingly small matzo balls in a broth that's salty and greasy – and not in a good way. This dish has since been 86'ed from the menu, but it may rear its ugly head again at any time!

Rivers Cuomo may have sung, "Cheese tastes so good/On a burnt piece of lamb," (in Weezer's "Dope Nose"), but really, it doesn't, and this little contraption calls into question whether lamb and cheese should ever be in close proximity. Those raw chopped green peppers are not doing this Japanese-grocery-store sandwich any good, either.

Deploying the blandest and slenderest bratwursts and franks, depositing them in a ketchup boat and sprinkling raw curry powder over the top may be post-WWII nostalgia for some Germans, but for the rest of us the combo leaves a gritty and cloyingly sweet taste in the mouth. The empty premises – with the Currywurst signage still up – is a monument to bad culinary ideas everywhere.

The gluey brown sauce comes from a bottle, the meat component is unidentifiable, and the crust has seen better days. The only thing worse than Roll and Go's teriyaki slice would be an entire teriyaki pie.