The 10 Best Responses to Nicoletta's Zero Star Review

Earlier today, New York Times critic Pete "the Punisher" wells filed a zero-star review of Michael White's new East Village pizzeria Nicoletta. It's the most negative review of Wells's career and the first goose egg White's received. Here, now, the ten funniest/most extreme/surprising reactions from Eater commenters:

1) guest: "My Nicoletta pizza had only a strong taste of crushed expections."

2) guest: "Somewhere, Chris Cannon is toasting Peter Wells with a nice Limoncello."

3) guest: "Cannon doesn't drink limoncello."

4) masterofceremonies: "To the more prodigious food historians: when's the last time we've seen a major player like White receive this kind of a take down on this kind of a scale?"

5) Answer from sneakeater: "Major takedown? It's a fucking pizza place. ... Anyway, the answer is: read Frank Bruni's Mercer Kitchen/Vong dual re-review."

6) guest: "You know the food is bad when the guy who gives out 2 stars like candy on Halloween drops a donut on you... Went there once, should've known better. Good to see this guy for once not giving a half assed review... Just telling it like it is. Marea is still the shit!."

7) slowernet: "Bloodbath in Little Wisco."

8) guest: "Frankly, I think most pizza places deserve a zero review -- the food they're serving is "fair" compared to what is being served at a good restaurant that does something more than pizza. A star should only go to an exceptional pizza and, frankly, I'm not sure what an exceptional pizza would be. "

9) Guest: "I have to agree with Pete on this one. I get it - its not NYC pizza, it's not Naples pizza. It's just not that good."

And then someone (the first commenter, actually) who actually disagreed with the review:

10) guest: "I had a great birthday dinner here. I think this review is way harsh."
· Pete the Punisher Gives the Goose Egg to Nicoletta [~ENY~]
· All Coverage of Nicoletta [~ENY~]
[Photo: Krieger]