Bars and Lounges: Neither Sophisticated Nor Sexy

Quick memo to club and lounge owners and their publicists who may be prepping the launch of a new venture. Your new lounge is neither sophisticated nor sexy, so there is no need to include these phrases in any press materials. The latest to violate this rule are the soon to re-open Union Square Lounge, which promises to "become the destination for your evening entertainment and enjoyment . . . served up in a sophisticated and sexy subterranean space", and Spice Market's new soiree offering a "sexy lounge-like atmosphere downstairs on Thursday nights". Back of the envelope calculations and rather unscientific studies show that 99% of all pre-launch marketing include these phrases, while less than 1% of the customers reported feelings of sexiness or sophistication after visiting said lounge. Going forward, let's agree to check the misused adjectives with the burly doorman and let us know that once open, the lounge will serve drinks, play music and offer couches for sitting. Honesty is so sexy and sophisticated.
· Union Square Lounge 2.0 [~ENY~]
· Spice Market's Sensual Lounge [~ENY~]