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Eater How-Not-To Special Update: Steven Hall Has 7 Tips, Too

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Just a little while ago, we shared some thoughts on an epically bad party Steven Hall threw at Bun last night. Here now, he responds.

I thought I was done answering your snide comments about the work we do, but since I've been doing restaurant openings much longer than Eater has been in existence here are my seven tips:

We said: 1) If you're throwing a party in a tiny narrow space, please do not invite 500 people if you're not going to remove the tables. Note photo above: do you see any room at all to move, because we do not. Related: it's a real problem if all the food is in the back.

1. We did invite a lot of people, but if you read the invitation you would've seen that it went from 6pm - 2am. It is not our fault if everyone chose to show up at the same time.
We said: 2) As the honcho of a small PR firm, it is your responsibility to attend your parties. Kindly stick around to ensure it goes smoothly. Do not skip out for a quickie massage around the corner.
2. I did not get a massage around the corner (as much as I may've needed one,) and was at the party except to attend the final friends and family at Nizza, another of our new clients, and then went back to the party. My staff was in charge while I was gone. As the honcho as a small pr firm it is my job to be everywhere; trail me one night and see if you can keep up. [Someone got a massage around the corner, maybe not all, but someone. Also, nice Nizza plug, SH. Pro-style.]
We said: 3) Plates of food tend to be a better move than empty plates with labels like "nem of duck and foie gras." But, here's a fun fact we did learn: Empty plates can be made to look somewhat appealing if full plates of gnarly braised duck hearts and tongues are kept close by.
3. I think that Michael and his team did a fantastic job of keeping up with the food, and if whoever you sent to the party happened upon empty plates that's life. You don't like duck tongues and hearts, and you call yourself an "eater"!
We said: 4) Generally, when one employs a doorman, the implication is that access to the door will be regulated by said person. If you're going to make it a complete free-for-all, not check names, open up the whole of the storefront, save your restaurant client's money, which is likely scarce to begin with, and keep this guy off the party budget.
4. I agree with the doorman's job, but unfortunately the restaurant invited people of their own who did not RSVP. If he was rude and denied an investor access that would've been a lot worse.
We said: 5) This one is a bit of a non sequitur in that it doesn't relate to party-throwing specifically, but the above photo of the men's bathroom: yes, that's the whole thing. ToiletWire: not present.
5. Can't argue with the lack of a toilet in the restaurant, except to say that I usually reserve that act for home.
We said: 6) The one move you can make to take the edge of a party that promises to be crushing is to keep the booze a-flowing. If you're going to have the people four-deep at the bar, kindly circulate drinks on trays.
6. Could you have carried a tray through that crowd?
We said: 7) As decor, non-locals in white blazers and hair gel can be a nice touch.
7. That was the LA side of the family. I will say that everyone had a great time, and as easily as you came you could've just left.
· Eater How-Not-Too: Throwing A Grand Opening Party at Bun [~E~]