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KALINA REPORTS: Irregularities at Shake Shack

Photo courtesy of Manhattan Offender.

When we received the above image, of a shockingly short lunch hour Shack line, we immediately dispatched Kalina to the scene to investigate. What could explain such a thin crowd in the Shack's first open days of the season? Had reports of winter cravings been greatly exaggerated? What about this picture were we missing?

Before you read on, we warn you that what Kalina discovered is downright shocking.

eatrinside4life: Okay. So, don't get me wrong, I think the Shake Shack has the best burgers in the city if not the world
eatrinside4life: I was in heaven enjoying my burger the other night, the second night they were open
eatrinside4life: BUT
SLNYDaddy uh oh
eatrinside4life: an hour later I was at home, and damn, that was a good thing, because I needed to be close to the toilet
SLNYDaddy oh?
eatrinside4life: and i recall the same thing happening to me last year, stomach issues a few minutes after the completion of the meal
SLNYDaddy you do understand the weight of your claims, yes?
eatrinside4life: yes, so to be sure i wasn't alone on this i posed the question to a few of my friends. 3 out of the 4 said they too had similar reactions
eatrinside4life: i know it is possible people might want to stone me for saying this
SLNYDaddy let me understand what you're saying
SLNYDaddy shake shack is giving you the runs?
eatrinside4life: yes.... severe
SLNYDaddy !!
SLNYDaddy this, indeed, might explain the extra short line yesterday
eatrinside4life: i think i might not really be alone on this, i think some people are too embarrassed to admit it
eatrinside4life: i'm not trying to cause a raucous. just want people to be warned or aware, that they might be in trouble if they are on a date
SLNYDaddy possible there is another explanation?
eatrinside4life: anything is possible, but i don't really think I have a weak stomach
eatrinside4life: and this wasn't the first time
SLNYDaddy the plot thickens
SLNYDaddy or thins
SLNYDaddy here's the question
SLNYDaddy are you going back?
eatrinside4life:well i have to, they gave me a free $2 gift card
· Shake Shack Open, Line-Free [~E~]
Kalina wants the truth. Victimized by the Shack? Don't be afraid to admit it.